How To Be Strong In A Relationship

chain links

How to be strong in a relationship often comes down to your confidence and self-esteem. If you have a good sense of who you are and have great self-esteem, you will be confident to be strong in a relationship.

Being strong is not to be confused with being bossy, arrogant, and always wanting things your way. In fact, that is the opposite of being strong. Being strong is all about recognizing what is needed and then acting upon that to make the necessary changes.

There will always be times when a relationship is not going well, and things are starting to go off the rails. That is when a strong person can recognize this and begin to take actions to repair it, together, as a partnership, with good communication, and by being fully open, honest and vulnerable. A strong person is willing to go to uncomfortable places to get everything back on track before it goes too far.

Can I Be The Strong One? woman flexing muscle

Anyone can be the strong one in a relationship. There are a few key things you need to do to be the strong one, but after that, you can be the one who understands there is a problem and then takes steps to turn things around and get the train back on the tracks and heading with full steam in the right direction for both of you.

Know Yourself.

Knowing who you are, what you like, what you don’t like, and knowing you have the confidence to work it out between the two of you is a crucial first step. Knowing what may be triggering you and what may be triggering your partner is an essential first step.

So sit down and really think about what is bothering you, why it is bothering you, and what you think the solution may be. Then you can sit down together and discuss in a respectful way how you are feeling, why you think that way, and what they think about it.

After genuinely hearing what they have to say about it and their truth, you can be the strong one and suggest some compromises or some ways of getting both of you to a good place with it. You have to know yourself before you can get to that talk. Otherwise, your needs will not be met in any way that makes you happy.

Respectful Listening.couple holding hands

Being a strong person will require you to have the patience to listen effectively, hear what the partner is saying, understand their point of view, and respect it. Be curious, ask questions, and be clear about their feelings and where they are coming from. That is the only way to fully engage with them and figure out what will work to get things back on track.

Accept Differences.

No one is the same! If you understand that you have weaknesses, as everyone does, and that you are not always going to agree or be on the same page, then you can talk to each other and discuss where you need support and what that support may look like.

Knowing and saying you need support in certain areas of your life is vulnerable, but it is also the most vital thing you can do in a relationship. Accept them for who they are, and know yourself for who you are, and everything can be worked out from there.

Uncomfort Leads To Comfort.hands reaching out to each other

As a couple who are not afraid to get too uncomfortable places with each other, you can have those talks that may be uncomfortable at first but lead to a resolution mutually.

After many uncomfortable talks about what is bothering you, it soon becomes comfortable to have those talks and just part of your open and connected life together. Like anything in life, the more you do it, the more comfortable it becomes. You will want to become comfortable with all your discussions, no matter how small or big.

Strong Is Flexible.

Being strong in a relationship is not about being unforgiving or getting what you want all the time. Being flexible is way stronger than being rigid. Rigid can crack, break or shatter, be flexible, bend to the situation, adjust, and then bounce back to where it was and move on. When having these vulnerable, open conversations, be flexible to what is needed for you and bend if it is necessary to meet each other’s needs.

Speak Your Truth.train tunnel

To be strong in your relationship, it is imperative to speak your truth at all times. When you are self-confident and have good self-esteem, you will be able to have the ability to speak your truth at all times.

You should not feel intimidated or bullied that you cannot speak your truth. Do not let anything linger or let go for another time; often, those times don’t come, and things linger and fester, and something minimal can lead to a considerable disagreement that no one knows why it happened. Speak your truth as soon as possible, and listen to their truth!

Live In The Now.

When you are having conflict or feeling less connected to your partner, express those feelings as they are happening. Sit down and calmly communicate how you feel right now and why you feel that way. This will allow you to solve things early and not get to be a big deal later.

Also, in reverse, if things are going well, and you are feeling very connected to your partner, let them know! It is always great to hear how your partner feels, especially when they love you and feel connected to you. You can even discuss why you feel so connected to them and how that makes you feel.

Conclusion.couple holding pinky fingers

Being strong in a relationship is never about being dominant or getting what you want because you are overpowering someone.

Being strong in a relationship is all about being flexible and knowing yourself, knowing your partner, being curious, engaged, and wanting to find the best solution for both of you.

If both of you are strong, the relationship will find its natural way, if one is strong and the other is not, the roads will separate, and you will struggle. Having a solid relationship means having both people strong, engaged, and fully connected; it can not be a one-way street.

My review of a great therapy website for support:

My review of the Self-Therapy Journey website:  Self Therapy Journey.

Here are some books that will help you as a couple: High Conflict Couple, Clinical Handbook Of Couple Therapy.

Feel free to leave a comment below, or email me with any questions or comments. I am here to support you in any way I can!

Ericman reaching to the sky

Email: Please email me here!

Website: Authentically Me Website!


  1. I agree: having a solid relationship means having both people strong, engaged and fully connected which, honestly, is a rare thing if not an ideal one at least in my opinion. Oftentimes, it is probably better to be alone than with the wrong person but there is no general rule because people and situations are so different.
    Thank you for this interesting and informative post. I really enjoyed reading it.

    • Thanks for the comment Ana. For me it is the only way to be in a relationship, otherwise being alone is better. When you have two strong, connected and engaged people, it is the only way it will be fulfilling.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *